With Gavin Newsom newly re-elected by a landslide margin of 77%, I thought it responsible to re-write my About Page or if you will oblige me - an About-face Page.
I bought the (Gavin Newsom Sucks.com) domain name over a few beers with a couple of buds – a sort of cyber squatting goof. Unfortunataly, both The Donald’s and gal-pal Rosie O’Donnell’s were taken, probably by each other – so, I bought Gavin’s.
There it sat dormant over a few more months… a few more beers with a couple more buds, until awakened by the City Hall Sex Scandal. At which time, I launched the following message:
Entertaining - Yes. Productive - No!Ironically, I recognize Gavin’s short comings in within myself to the point I love and laugh more than most at his never-ending girls and gaffes. I’d say Brittanie Mountz is still my favorite... I can identify with Gavin's temporary insanity - She's got legs that go to go to heaven; I especially like her MySpace photo.
"I like boozing, schmoozing losers winning (and womanizing) as much as the next guy. But, when I’m not watching nighttime dramas, I’m busy watching my city’s homelessness and violence grow – two issues that Gavin campaigned upon and have steadily worsened since his ascendancy."
"Newsom’s ‘poor decisions’ affect us all. I’m not political and don’t claim to have any answers. I only know I don’t want to see Gavin win another election."
My “Soul Goal” is to advocate Clean, Safe Streets and I found some help over the Pirate Cat Radio airwaves and in The Chronicle, interviewed by the Smokin’ Hot Cecilia M. Vega, who somehow resists my metrosexual charm - for now!
Things were going swimmingly until it occured to me – if not Gavin, who?I mean Gavin Sucks, but Chris Daly Blows.com! With the help of Mirkarimi and Gonzalez, he proved it - putting together the biggest Regressives Convention since the Nixon Administration and the biggest salad-eating fiasco producing zero candidates.
With Gavin showing 78% approval ratings, they were wise to fold before they flopped!But, Old Man Lumpy wasn’t finished – Not yet! If San Francisco's voters won’t listen, then he’ll just have to scare that pesky Gavin out of City Hall. So, he summoned the Ghost of McCarthy to huff, puff and bluff public humiliation announcements from Croneyism to Cocaine… save none could sink Gavin and the Gang.
Busted - Can't touch this teflon doo. What you say bounces off of me and sticks to you!Daly's which hunt bit him in the ass and bought him a tongue lashing and demotion in swift order - Bravo Peskin!
Stealing a scene from Michael Moore’s Flip-Flop, I followed with an About-face, realizing Gavin’s the only candidate with the necessary political clout within the City and more importantly the potential beyond to successfully clean up our streets today.
In other words, Gavin is just four years away from a bigger office far outside the City limits with a constituency infinitely more conservative. Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for Same-Sex Marriages, but it doesn't ring with the same cache down South. Gavin’s capital here is essentially confederate money there.
If he’s to compete against credible candidates, he’ll have to tip this exchange rate in his favor with a compelling story that scales ala:
Rudy Giuliani’s 911 and crime fighting fetes – from bankrupt to boomtown!Today’s “Services or Citation” program is veneer-thin. If Newsom wants to give it some teeth, he'll have put an end to the revolving door that exists violent inmates and drug addicts back onto out streets, then he needs to put his pearly whites and blue tie to work selling to the public, politicking private business and pressuring Old School Progressives within for a real, lasting institutional change and sustaining investment.
Remember, there’s no such thing as a bad crack addict, theif or rapist, just bad elected officials.Quantify the cost of the status quo, ranging from Quality-of-Life to Life itself. Call it the “Price of Life” initiative and sell it against the cost of police, social services, etc!
This is no revelation to the Newsom camp. They they know what’s at stake in four years and need your help to do right now, right here – write him!
Mayor Gavin Newsom
4104 24th Street #766
San Francisco, CA 94114
Phone: 1(415) 351-0359
About You. About Time. About-Face!
- Challenge for SF Mayor: Clean Up the Streets by CW Nevius