Thursday, August 30, 2007

Gavin Newsom's Labor Day Music Mix

The San Francisco Labor Council (SFLC) announced their endorsement for Mayor Gavin Newsom's campaign for re-election, so we thought to observe the occasion with a compilation of the mayor's more entertaining headlines: City Hall Sex Scandal, Gav’s Girls, Mayor McChicken, Photo-Ops, Dirty Tricks, Diapergate, Boozing and generally avoiding playground bully, Dan Noyes, at all cost.

WARNING: The Gavin Newsom Sucks.com Mix contains EXPLICIT lyrics; yet, how else could we chronicle the Mad Mad Mayor's many Highs and Lows?

The starting whistle opens with ‘Young Folks’ by ‘Peter [Ragone] aka Bjorn and John [Nelson]’ and Gav’s Girls Ruby, Paris Hilton and Brittany Mountz inspire 'Ruby' and ‘One Night in Paris’ and ‘Jailbait respectively. Finally, ‘Betray’ brings us to our rockin’ conclusion.

1) Peter Bjorn and John – ‘Young Folks’ .mp3
2) The Rakes - 'The World Was a Mess But His Hair Was Perfect’ .mp3
3) Franz Ferdinand – ‘Walk Away’ .mp3
4) Franz Ferdinand – ‘Cheating on You’ .mp3
5) Kaiser Chiefs – ‘Ruby’ .mp3
6) The Kooks – ‘Sofa Song’ .mp3
7) Spoon – ‘I Turn My Camera On’ .mp3
8) K.R.O. – ‘Strap On Your Pampers Diapers’ .mp3
9) Les Claypool – ‘Robot Chicken’ .mp3
10) Amy Winehouse – ‘Rehab’ .mp3
11) Fuck – ‘Diapers’ .mp3
12) Hayseed Dixie – ‘My Best friend’s Girl' .mp3
13) 8-Bit – ‘Drunk’ .mp3
14) Hellogoodbye – ‘Homewrecker’ .mp3
15) Dee Dee Ramone – ‘Hop Around’ .mp3
16) Nous Non Plus – ‘One Night In Paris’ .mp3
17) Motorhead – ‘Jailbait’ .mp3
18) Minor Threat – ‘Betray’ .mp3

Keep Cool My Babies and Stay Tuned for the imminent Mayoral Victory Mix!!!

Chickography

Shhhh. Don’t tell Jennifer Siebel, but Forbes declared Gavin, San Francisco’s Most Eligible Bachelor 2007.

As reported By Forbes Staff Writer, Elisabeth Eaves:

The handsome young mayor was—until recently—seen as a rising star in the Democratic Party. But the affair he had with his campaign manager's wife probably nixed his chances of winning higher office.


Chickography: Gavin Newsom, 39 Mayor

Breaking News!

WiTri?

Regressives Kill Free WiFi Deal

You'll have to keep borrowing free Wi-Fi from cafes and the unsecured accounts of your neighbors for now -- Earthlink's backed out of the public-private free WiFi deal with San Francisco because of its recent financial woes.

Gavin Newsom says he's committed to finding another private company to set up the whole system, and blames the Politics-As-Usual Suspects like Chris Daly that comprise the “Regressive-laden” Board of Supervisors for the deal falling through.

Another Quality-of-Life initiative D.O.A. Too bad, the Earthlink deal would have been helpful to launch a “Cyber-Roots” Internet campaign to Dump Daly!!!

Post: Free Earthlink WIFI Deal Dies by SFist

Monday, August 27, 2007

Mecke Rejects Daly’s Endorsement

Meet the latest Regressive hope, same as the old dope.

According to Chris Daly, "Quintin Mecke is not just talk. He's been working on the important issues facing San Francisco for years. For those concerned about public safety, neighborhood protections, and affordable housing, Quintin Mecke is our best choice for Mayor."
'Cause I've got friends in low places
Where Chris Daly drowns
And endorsements chase the votes away

- Garth Brooks

At which point Mecke, a recent entry into the Mayor's race, should have joined ranks distancing himself from blacklisted board member dissident Chris Daly by respectfully declining the endorsement and establishing himself as a genuine agent of change.

Instead, Mecke took a road less traveled by, alienating everyone who's anyone with an alliance to nowhere. Acknowledging more of the same translates into guilt by association.

In other words, a vote for Mecke is a vote for crack addicts breaking into our cars and living on our sidewalks. Their blight is our plight while the typical Regressive homeopathic wizardry continues to treat without cure.
"I am proud to have the endorsement of Chris Daly. His early endorsement sends a strong message to San Franciscans who are hungry for change. San Francisco can do better, and it is time to hold Gavin Newsom accountable for his failures in governing this city."

Fraud! Rather, it’s time for the mayor to exert his political clout, make good to this electorate and win over his next delivering old-fashioned medicine - a cop on every corner. I'm for helping those who want help and all for locking away the rest.

This is where Chris Daly and I diverge. And, this is where Menke and Daly meet up for another four year wait.

Complete Article: Latest Progressive Hope by SFist

Sunday, August 26, 2007

Care, Not Recycle

San Francisco Chronicle's C.W. Nevius:

Whenever there is discussion of the homeless encampments in Golden Gate Park, it always leads to a central question: Why are they there?

The obvious reasons are that the park is large and hard to patrol, it is adjacent to panhandler- and needle exchange-friendly Haight Street, and San Francisco's temperate climate keeps camping out from becoming too uncomfortable.

And then there is that cash machine right there in the park.

The Haight-Ashbury Neighborhood Council recycling center, which is located at the southeast corner of the park, next to Kezar Pavilion, is a morning institution for the down-and-outers.

They stop in, drop off cans, bottles and plastic (which even recycling officials admit often come from the blue commercial recycling bins), and pick up a morning cash payment. From there it is anyone's guess what they do with the money.

RJ Pettit, a recycler who walked all the way from his city-sponsored hotel in downtown San Francisco to drop off recyclables, said:
"If you give an alcoholic or a drug addict money, they may buy booze or drugs,
but he might also buy food, or clothing, or get a place to sleep."
That's a lovely thought, but realistically, wouldn't we expect that Pettit's first instinct was right?

That's why Mayor Gavin Newsom's homeless program was called, "Care, not cash."

A nearby neighbor said:

"It's a cash register for them. It is accommodating their lifestyle."
In fact, with a little collecting - or a scoop into an unsupervised blue recycling bin - a scavenger can easily score $5. Someone like Pettit, who collected two large trash bags of bottles and cans, can clear more. He was paid $27.50 the day I was there.

HANC (commonly known as "Hank" in the Haight) has run the recycling center since 1974, at a time when recycling was as exotic as a serving of tofu. It clearly filled a need at the time, and was given a sweetheart city rental agreement - just $5,000 a year - and prime location next to the old Kezar football field. (At present it is on a month-to-month agreement.)

There are city officials who wonder if this is the best use of park land, but they are reluctant to step up against the famously feisty, and progressive HANC, which can mobilize plenty of political clout.

Friday, August 24, 2007

Siebel Speaks (…er…rather spoke)

I know this is old news, as the Chonicle's Girlfriend Uniterupted erupted back in March. Aparently, SFluxe just got round to commenting on Jennifer Siebel's massive hallucination - having imagined all of San Francisco simply dreamt Brittanie Mountz into reality.

She quotes Gavin as telling her, after the date, “You’re not going to want to talk to me after tomorrow. There’s a thing in the paper coming out about me and my 20-year-old girlfriend. I never dated her.”

Ditto for Ruby Rippey-Tourk who Jennifer holds responsible for the City Hall Sex Scandal.

“The woman is the culprit….”
Sounds like a healthy relationship. How does that Rick Springfield tune go?
You know, I wish that I had Gavin's girl,
Where can I find a woman like that?
Read the complete post: Siebel Speaks (and it ain’t pretty) [sfluxe.com]

Drag 'em, Drop 'em Mayor Tangled In 'Next Gen' Web

As posted by CatCubed:

Web 2.0 and Design geek with zeal for blogging about blogging, Colin Fahrion, visits the candidate's websites to peel back the presentation layer and see who's GUIer:
  • The ever Flexible and Intuitive "Drag 'em, Drop 'em" Gavin Newsom, or
  • All Business 2.o and "Next Gen" Showman Chicken John Rinaldi?

Chicken’s joined facebook too on the advice of Scott Beale of LaughingSquid. Chicken’s also on that den of iniquity and bad design myspace and tribe. Next thing we know he’ll be on Twitter, Flickr, Pownce, Digg, Delicious, and of course YouTube — well actually Chicken is already on YouTube with a video of him eating a lightbulb.

So let’s tally up the scores of who’s the more 21st Century political candidate…

Google Name Recognition:

Web 2.0 Social Aptitude:

  • Chicken John - 1 facebook profile, 1 myspace profile, 1 tribe profile
  • Gavin Newsom - 3 facebook profiles, 3 myspace profiles, and one Gavin Newsom Sucks myspace profile. {While Gavin wins by sheer number of profiles I have a strange feeling they aren’t really him, so I had to give this one to Chicken}

NOTE: MySpace just inexplicably locked us [Gavin Newsom Sucks] out with over 15oo friends. What's next?

Blog-o-Sphere Cred:

  • Chicken John - 1 fresh off the presses mayoral blog written by the man himself (when he doesn’t have the cold that is); hosted at Wordpress.com but with his own domain which adds a couple more cred points
  • Gavin Newsom - 1 boring PR spewing pseudo-blog written by the mayoral toadies in Newsom’s name; hosted as a subdomain on Typepad. And 1 other boring PR spewing pseudo-blog with an unknown CMS with a lousy old HTML 4.01 Transitional doctype.

YouTube Stardom:

From a mayoral gravitas perspective, I don’t think either candidate wins in this department.

So there you have it! Chicken John is the better 21st century political candidate! Gavin is more searchable by far, but Chicken’s web presence is more personal and web 2.0 connected — quantity vs quality.

Unfortunately, for elections it’s quantity that wins. No matter though it’s always worth it to add that little something else to spice up the pot, so go help Chicken John!

San Francisco has a matching funds program for public elections. Chicken's holdin' $21,247 with a 5:00 deadline, Tuesday. If the $25k goal is met, they match 4:1 So $25k gets you $50k for a total of 75k - sweet!

Wednesday, August 22, 2007

Separated at Birth


Chickens? Cheating? Winning?

Makes you wonder if the Home Run King Barry Bonds and San Francisco's Mayor were separated at birth?

Who better to host Friday's ceremony than Gavin Newsom who rocked City Hall earlier this year with an extra-marital affair only to round the bases with 78% approval ratings and second term!

The noon ceremony will be held at Justin Herman Plaza at 1 Market St. across from the Ferry Building.

San Francisco Giants players, broadcasters and executives will be on hand and Giants public address announcer Renel-Brooks Moon will emcee the event.

Bonds hit the record-breaking homerun Aug. 7 off of Washington Nationals pitcher Mike Bacsik at AT&T Park. Matt Murphy, 21, of Queens, N.Y., caught the historic ball and the San Francisco Examiner reports it's up for auction.

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Wait & See

A month ago, San Francisco Chronicle’s C.W. Nevius went to look for homeless encampments in Golden Gate Park. When he found them, and stacks of hypodermic needles nearby, the response was both vociferous and overwhelming.

Stung by the criticism and outrage from the public, Mayor Gavin Newsom has thrown a task force at the problem. Each morning for the past month, a caravan of San Francisco police, Department of Public Works, Rec and Park, Department of Public Health and outreach workers have hit the park at 4 a.m.

Monday, Nevius went back to see what had been cleaned up, what hadn't changed and what new problems had cropped up. There were fewer needles and campers in the obvious spots. But it still wasn't difficult to find them. A three-hour visit Monday morning turned up several encampments -- including two dug-in campsites on a hill no more than 100 feet from the main office of the Recreation and Park Department -- and used hypodermic needles at three separate locations.

As impressive as the regular morning sweep is, how long will it continue? Police officers already are complaining that, as Sgt. Frank Lee of the Richmond Station says: "it draws a lot of resources away from other police problems.''

"Every time something in the paper makes this administration look bad, they throw a bunch of money at it and hope for the best.'' - Sgt. John Lewis of Park Station
At the mayor's office, they insist that this is no flash in the pan.

The mayor's spokesman Nathan Ballard says, "Those 4 a.m. sweeps will go on indefinitely. What is being implemented is what we view as a permanent solution.''

Nevius says, he'll believe it when he sees it. And he fully intends to keep an eye on it, adding as much work as has gone into this effort in the last 30 days, we are far from saying that it is safe for parents to let their kids run along the dirt trails that wind into the wooded areas off the main roads.

Take Chicken Hill, a favorite illegal campground above the tennis courts. When he climbed up to Chicken Hill in July, we encountered an established encampment with a smoking campfire, chairs, tarps, and eight to 10 residents.

At 7:45 Monday morning, Chicken Hill was a showpiece for the "new'' Golden Gate Park. The area, clearly a priority for the crews, had been raked and cleaned up and didn't have a single camper. Unfortunately, when he continued up the trail a ways, he stumbled over another two camps.

We also found newly inhabited spots. Reader Michael Rhoase, who walks his dog in the park daily, alerted the Chronicle to the redwood grove east of the Rose Garden. A short trip down a dirt hill takes you into a lovely glade, shadowed by the towering redwoods.

But, as one of the city parks department gardeners warned, this is "no-man's-land.'' We found needles there, camping spots and a piece of cardboard with the words, "Don't take this! Its (sic) my bed, bitch!''

Rhoase says he finds needles almost every day and also has come across mail stolen from homes in the Avenues.

"At first the situation was dramatically improved. In the last week, however, I'm sad to say that things are returning to the way they were before.''
That's the persistent refrain from nearly everyone who loves the park -- things might have improved, but will it last?

Michael Williams has lived a few blocks from the Conservatory of Flowers for nine years. He and his wife have volunteered in cleanups, have donated to fundraisers and walk in the park daily.

"We walk all parts of the park, and we still see the homeless camps. I'm just waiting to see what happens.''
But just to be clear, the mayor shouldn't confuse "wait and see'' with any suggestion that this is an issue that is going to die out.

"This has been written about before,'' says Sgt. Lee at the Richmond Station, a lifelong San Franciscan. "But I don't think I have ever seen this kind of response. People saw this park and said they couldn't believe that it had been let deteriorate like this. They reached a breaking point.''

In the last month, there were pages of comments on the columns on SFGate.com and hundreds of e-mails. The sense of frustration was obvious.

"I don't know what the answer is,'' said Laura Foulke, who walks her dog, Chico, in the park twice a day. "But there has got to be one. It seems to me that other cities handle it. Why can't we?''

SFGate: After A Month, Park's A little Less Of A Mess - Major Homeless Campsites Cleared, But Some Have Just Shifted Position by C.W. Nevius, San Francisco Chronicle

SFGate: City Says 167 Homeless Camps Removed From S.F.'s Golden Gate Park by Heather Knight, Chronicle Staff Writer

HIPSTER or HOMELESS?

On the lighter side of a serious subject, local blog, FromSF, has introduced a game called, Hipster or Homeless? You drive around pointing out people on the street, that due to poor fashion choices or poor life choices, look to be either a hipster or a homeless person.

Vote Today and every Friday. Send your own clippings and they might use them in a future posts.

Monday, August 20, 2007

The Shame of the City

Stanley Roberts of KRON 4 followed a couple of Panhandlers around San Francisco to see what they do with the money they make Panhandling. What was found was very disturbing:



The problem is so entrenched, it spans a generation. San Francisco has struggled since the early 1980s with a population of homeless people that mushrooms annually despite every effort to reduce it -- from the police-heavy Matrix program of the early 1990s to the stalled Continuum of Care proposal. Today, there are 15,000 homeless people in the city, and 5,000 of them are hard core.

Do something. Do nothing. Tell panhadlers to go to Glide!

Glide Memorial Methodist Church is a supportive housing complex that runs 950 supportive housing units in renovated hotels and is eager to help. Other Ideas: Vote; Letters; Phone Calls; Blog; Vigilante; Organize; Protest; Revolt?

-- Gavin Newsom: Mayor of San Francisco. Newsom's Care Not Cash initiatives treat the most-troubled homeless people directly routing them into "supportive housing" with counseling services for substance abuse and mental problems. Unfortunately, it's been four years and Gavin's number one priority is growing worse, not better!

-- Trent Rhorer: Executive director of the Department of Human Services. Rhorer oversees the city's shelter and welfare programs and a $500 million budget. He has an extensive background in social services, worked as chief of staff for the prior Human Services director and has worked in San Francisco's nonprofit sector.

-- Dariush Kayhan: Rhorer's director of housing and programs for homeless people. Kayhan manages shelter operations and the city's program of leasing rooms in privately owned residential hotels and offering "supportive housing," in which counseling and other services are provided on-site for the hard-core homeless people.

-- Mitch Katz: Director of the Department of Public Health. He oversees San Francisco General Hospital and other clinics that are the primary caregivers for homeless people. Newsom needs Katz's expertise to rein in the spiraling costs of medical treatment.

-- Angela Alioto: Former city supervisor. She endorsed Newsom for mayor after her own losing bid and is now an adviser to the mayor on homelessness issues. Alioto wrote Proposition J, which was passed by voters in November and requires the city to provide separate shelters for homeless seniors, youth, families and the disabled. Newsom wants her to help oversee its enactment.

-- Marc Trotz: Katz' director of housing and urban health. He runs the department's Direct Access to Housing program, considered by federal officials to be the nation's finest example of supportive housing.

-- The Rev. John Hardin: Director of the St. Anthony Foundation. The foundation's nonprofit facility in the Tenderloin runs the city's oldest soup kitchen, and over the past year he has been holding talks with business leaders to try to ease hostilities between them and homeless people.

-- Paul Boden: Leader of the Coalition on Homelessness. Boden's group is the most active and outspoken advocacy group for the homeless -- the coalition can quickly pack a hearing with stinky demonstrators if they think homeless rights to live on our sidewalks are at risk.

-- Carol Lamont: Head of community development programs at the San Francisco Foundation.

-- Cassandra Benjamin: Head of homelessness programs at the Charles and Helen Schwab Foundation. Lamont and Benjamin have led efforts by philanthropic groups to help San Francisco work on strategy with other cities and counties and attract private funding.

-- John Hutar: President of the Hotel Council of San Francisco. The council, which represents 55 mostly upscale hotels, ran a billboard campaign last year saying homeless people had an adverse effect on tourism. Hutar says he is willing to work with anyone, including advocates for the homeless who were infuriated by the billboards, if it results in solutions.

-- Chris Daly: Absolute Failure.

-- Matt Gonzalez: Green Party Pooper.

-- Carla Javitz: National coordinator for the Corporation for Supportive Housing's Bay Area office. Javitz and her staff are among the nation's leading experts on developing supportive housing, and their advice led Newsom to propose a $150 million bond measure to build more supportive housing.

Adapted from: Shame of the City - Chance to solve homeless crisis by Chronicle's Kevin Fagan

Taking Back The Streets

I thought to publish a post by Sentinel Editor, Pat Murphey. It's a bit dated, but still very relevant. Though $500,000 was appropriated to the community courts, there is still no approved plan in place. I know Gavin's got four more years, but (as Pat would write) "Cum On (!)" the waiting game is killing us:

March 2, 2007

Look for color to return to Gavin Newsom’s face… Finally, his supporters (most San Franciscans) can feel passion again for his re-election as San Francisco mayor… Long time supporters still had their shoulders to the wheel… But the passion was evaporating…

There’s no one else, a spotty yet echoing resignation…It’s the streets, stupid… Paraphrasing Bill Clinton’s first presidential campaign synthesis of voter primary concern… Streets are vile and root cause fatigue weights the caring… Even cum-by-yah District Attorney Kamala Harris made noises this week about now(!) sending prosecutors to real courts for quality of life prosecutions…

Comes now The Gav’s insistence on replacing existing no-judge, no-prosecutor community courts with real judges presiding over neighborhood courts. Modeled after New York where impressive number of defendants actually show up for rehabilitation or community services ordered…

That engenders passion…

Today Newsom’s homeless czarina Angela Alioto and The Gav convene a City Hall media roundtable on the passion issue which handed Newsom the mayoralty first time around… The idea of ‘care not cash,’ then despised by entitlement grant of immuners… It worked… It worked politically and it worked in housing the homeless… So well it became world model…

Huge strokes for them… Go away to the naysayers…



Complete Article: An issue returning passion to San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom re-election

Sunday, August 19, 2007

Gavin is Shaking in his Cole Haans

SfGate Culture Blog's own Beth Spotswood delivers a humorous account of mayoral candidates who met Friday's deadline as well as a few who are conspicuously did not:

Gavin is Shaking in his Cole Haans

Mayor Gavin Newsom confuses his opponent Chicken John with his favorite hobo, Patches.
So I guess now we know who is officially running for Mayor of San Francisco, as Friday was the filing deadline. Looks like we've got incumbent and love of my life Gavin Newsom, who, because it's God's will, is obviously going to win.

And then a total freak show.

That little Josh "Jailbait" Wolf is running, and actually, I find it kind of charming because he uses just as much hair product as Gavin. Josh claims that if elected, he's going to wear a video camera to work, which I'm envisioning being attached to some kind of helmet, thus ruining his faux-hawk.

Supervisor Tony Hall of 'Tony Hall and the Hallmarks' is running. I have no idea what his platform is, but the man rocks one hell of a bunny-hop.

Then there's some dude named Chicken John. I think that kinda speaks for itself.
Grasshopper Kaplan, the hobo taxi driver, thinks he's got a shot. I just don't get how he can prove he lives in San Francisco. We've also got a nudist, a sex club owner and h. brown, who wears his medicinal weed badge like a prom corsage.

The hottie contingent includes Lonnie Holmes and Quintin Mecke, and I'll admit a weakness for the pretty boys. I've just never heard of these two and I'm got to see them in a couple more outfits before I take them seriously.

Finally, there's Wilma, Ahimsa and Billy Bob. Who? What? Why? Really, San Francisco?
Let me just give a shout out to Chris Daly and Matt Gonzalez right now.

You both are bitches.

I mean it.

You know I love Gavin. He's my total boyfriend/future ex-husband. But come ON. Put your (not very much) money where your (hippie, smelly) mouth is.

Some dude named "Chicken John" is running against your nemesis for Mayor of the very city to which you claim to be so deeply and selflessly devoted. When push comes to shove, you both -- appropriately enough -- chicken out.

Lame. Seriously. Lame.

I'm unimpressed. I never want to hear another word from either of you again. Tho, Matt's been kinda quiet lately anyway. Maybe he's been focusing on his art.

So, Chris Daly, who I SO looked forward to writing about, you are a big, chicken-s--- tease who can apparently give it, but not take it.

If you are going to flip out at Board meetings and accuse Hottie McRehab of being a crack whore, then at least have the balls to drop 5K and prove you can do it better. Otherwise, what's the point? You kinda remind me of that guy from the Sopranos. What's his name? Oh, yeah...

Beth Spotswood describes herself as "The 29-year-old equivalent of Dorothy from The Golden Girls." She spends her free time pretending not to stare at crazy people screaming on San Francisco's sidewalks. Originally from Marin, Beth now lives in the Mission and doesn't get why people are so into burritos. You can find Beth here every Wednesday at noon, and at I'll Flip You. Flip You For Real, where "The opinions expressed are ridiculous and in no way reflect anything of value. Do not take them seriously..."

SFGate Post By: Beth Spotswood (Email) August 15 2007 at 12:00 PM

Photo Credit: Deanne Fitzmaurice / The Chronicle

Friday, August 17, 2007

Thank You! Thank You!

One's not enough, and two's ohh, ahh plenty!

Like Noah's Ark, fellow Reactionaries lined up "Two at Time" in bountiful droves to take shelter and merriment at Balboa Café celebrating the Mayor’s eminent triumph. Thank you to all, especially Gavin Newsom who tastefully stopped by with a bottle of PlumpJack, 1999 Estate, Oakville to express gratitude for our support.

We’re thinking the bottle may make a nice raffle prize at our next event... Maybe October 31st since Halloween has been cancelled. What’s the re-gifting etiquette - trick or treat?

Aside from the Chronicle's Cecilia M. Vega commitment to another news story, the Mayor's Victory Party was an overwhelming success. Kudos to the folks at California Conservative, SF Crime, SF Party Party, Pirate Cat Radio, The Daly Show and Dump Daly.

Please send any incriminating photos of the after party and we will be sure to post 'em too. Thank you! Thank you!

Coverage: Culture Blog, SFist.

Thursday, August 16, 2007

Hell Freezes Over

Regardless where you fall on the San Francisco Color Wheel, Gavin’s pearly grin and all ye who abandoned their party, platform and reason for the Mayor with Hair!

Round and Round She Goes. From Primaries to Pastel. Hippies in Suits in a tug-o-war with ‘Suits’ in Tees. Where Liberals are Democrats; Democrats, Republicans and Conservatives, Progressive.

Stop by the Gavin Newsom Victory Happy Hour!

Balboa Café/Plumpjack
3199 Fillmore Street (at Greenwich) San Francisco, CA 94123

Thank God. Bleeding-panty politics as usual suspects took one look at Gavin’s 78% approval rating and folded before the flop.
Hell just froze over, you dirty, stinkin’ Hippies.
With nothing but static to the Left of the radio dial, we’re all smiles to the right, Gavin’s just four year’s away from a bigger office with a constituency far outside the City limits and infinitely more conservative. We can finally rid our sidewalks Homeless and Homicides with That Old-Time medicine – Cop on every corner!

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Those Pesky Golfers!

Golfers may become endangered feces, if a petition drafted by the Neighborhood Parks Counsel. Sign here.

San Francisco is planning to study the utilization of our seven mostly vacant and money losing golf courses. SF Party Party tees off on Gavin Newsom giving away 440 acres of prime public space to golfers, guestimating 50 pissed off golfers in total or about 8 golfers per golf course or 1/2 golfer per hole – approximately $10,000 a swing!

There is not enough public space in San Francisco and the time has come to open up our public land to the public in the form of parks, soccer fields, skate parks, etc. Sure keep a couple golf courses, just enough to cover the actual demand.

A flute without holes, is not a flute. A donut without a hole, is a Danish. - Ty Webb: Caddyshack (1980)
Another alternative is Gavin Sucks.com at the historic Tenderloin Golf Course. The tees, fairways and greens are undergoing election year restoration, paved with fresh asphalt and lined by sidewalks with a modern drainage system to encourage "firm and fast" conditions. Offline shots are more likely to roll into difficult spots among or behind newly planted Mexican Fan Palms. Natural waste areas, lower-level bunkers, greenside chipping areas and water hazards may also come into play more often.

Print your score card and join me on the links each Sunday to chart the City's success!!!

Meet up at the 19th hole, Original Joe's, which also doubles as the banquet hall for the award ceremony: Pimp My Shopping Cart, Closest to the Pin, Hottest Cart Girl, Best Dressed.





























Sfist: Golf Dorks March

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

San Francisco's Black Eye

In today’s Matier & Ross:

In San Francisco, even the state's top lawman is not immune to getting his car broken into - even when it's parked next to City Hall.

Just ask Attorney General Jerry Brown, who had his official state car broken into while it was left briefly in front of the State Building at Civic Center.

Brown said he and his driver hadn't been in the building more than 10 minutes when they came back to find someone had smashed the passenger-side window of his 6-year-old Lincoln Town Car.

Breaking into the attorney general's car in the middle of Civic Center is a bit on the bold side, but not all that unusual in San Francisco these days.
"Right across from City Hall, in plain view of the mayor's office. He could have seen it from his office window."
According to police statistics, so far this year, thieves have broken into cars in San Francisco an average of 32 times a day. As for former Oakland Mayor Brown, he's seen enough:
"An official state car - the taxpayers' car - and they stole the GPS unit as well. I'm going back to Oakland. I've never had my car broken into there."
On, that note, SFist Blotter turned us on to terrific blog cataloging San Francisco Crime. Welcome to the neighborhood Jerry. I’ve survived three broken windows and one convertible top, but at least I’m still breathing.

SF Crime reports 68 murders in San Francisco as of August 9th. The murder total has increased 24% from last year. Plain and simple, we need more cops.

Mayor Gavin Newsom is to be commended for stepping up to grant SFPD a 24% pay raise as part of an Anti-Violence Plan to combat summer hotspots including the Bayview, Mission, Tenderloin and Western Addition.

If you live in any of these neighborhoods, take a cab (not MUNI) to Balboa Cafe's Happy Hour and help us knock back the Plumpjack as we celebrate Gavin's Mayoral Victory, Thursday.

Complete Article: Car of state's top lawman broken into near City Hall by Matier & Ross

Monday, August 13, 2007

Cecilia M Vega Is One Smoking Hot Journalist!

… Aside from Cecilia's obvious good looks, brains and cl ass, we hope she'll swing by Thursday’s Happy Hour at Balboa Café to swig Plumpjack and help us commemorate our 100th posting on Gavin Sucks.com, created in the aftermath of San Francisco’s City Sex Scandal, as well as to thank her for kickstarting our blog with her coverage in the Chronicle just six months ago.

Today's piece by Cecilia observes Gavin Newsom cautioning a crowd of cheering supporters (a thinning heard with climbing approval ratings) against prematurely celebrating his re-election victory, saying that despite the absence of a challenger who comes close to matching his campaign war chest or popularity, the race “is not over.”
"We've got work to do. Don't let anyone think this race is over. It's not over - we've got a dozen candidates."

Conspicuously, none of which include Chris Daly, Ross Mirkarimi, or Matt Gonzalez. Each participated in the Regressive Convention (the biggest assembly of salad-eaters since the Nixon era) only to fold their cards at the sight of Newsom’s 78% approval ratings.

With nothing but static to the Left of the radio dial and lonely Conservative Tony “The Tiger” Hall to the Right, Gavin may be tempted to chase the Tiger by the tail, locking up a few taggers, pimps, hos and homeless. While effective, those tactics could wake up the sleeping "Fruit Flys" hatching two Chicken votes for each swiped from the Tiger.

November will be another story. Gavin is just four years away from a bigger office with a constituency far outside the City limits, not to mention infinitly more conservative and far less forgiving. In other words, we can finally tackle chronic Quality-of-Life issues worsening daily. Reactionaries Unite!

Sadly, Cecilia goes on to report of a Vegan victory as incumbant District Attorney Kamala Harris is also running unopposed. In my opinion, she deserves a Life Sentence for poorly defending fallen police officers including Isaac Espinosza by prosecuting without a Death Penalty. Shame.

Complete Article: Mayor Newsom Says He’s No Shoo-In: ‘It’s’ Not Over’ by Cecilia M. Vega, Chronicle Staff Writer

Photo Credit: Luke Thomas, Fog City Journal

Saturday, August 11, 2007

Gavin Newsom’s Victory Happy Hour!

The website was created in the aftermath of the mayor’s City Hall Sex Scandal in an effort to elicit more responsible leadership and a more conservative approach to long-time chronic homelessness and homicides growing exponentially.

Since that time, the mayor has acknowledged his apathy and revitalized his policy to include competitive pay for police, community courts, and swept our parks to quell TB, AIDs & Malaria.

Like Michael Moore, Gavin Newsom Sucks.com has flip-flopped its position and is hosting a Re-election Happy Hour at Balboa Café in his Honor’s honor.

Here’s to honor. Getting on her and staying on her!

  • Balboa Café/Plumpjack

  • 3199 Fillmore Street (at Greenwich)

  • San Francisco, CA 94123

  • Thursday, August 16th

We were not surprised to learn the Regressive Convention, although the biggest assembly of limp wrist salad-eaters since the Nixon era, produced zero candidates. Bleeding-panty politics-as-usual suspects like Chris Daly, Ross Mirkarimi, and Matt Gonzalez took a peek at Gavin’s 78% approval ratings showing and quickly folded before the flop.

With nothing but static to the Left of the radio dial and all smiles on the Right (except Tony “The Tiger” Hall), Gavin is just four years away from a bigger office with a constituency far outside the City, not to mention far more conservative and far less forgiving.

In other words, we can finally tackle the Quality-of-Life problems that have long plagued San Francisco draining our City of tourism, taxes and good times!
Here's to keeping the Hippies and Hypocrites in their vegitative state. The Vegans are finally food's food. Reactionaries Unite!
Thank God! My ‘soul’ goal is clean, safe streets. I’ve got some good ideas. Do you? If so, bring ‘em with and we’ll tip some Plumpjack.

Friday, August 10, 2007

Gavin Newsom Endorses Hillary Clinton

Gavin Newsom endorsed Hillary Clinton's presidential bid Friday, the latest in a string of prominent Californians who are throwing their support behind the New York Democrat.

Newsom will co-chair the campaign with Los Angeles Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa who officially endorsed Clinton's bid last May. The senator has also won endorsements from California Sen. Dianne Feinstein, California Rep. Jane Harman, and Assembly Speaker Fabian Nunez.

Of course, you recall Villaraigosa, like Newsom, has been the subject of a City Hall sex scandal, having admitted to an extramarital affair last month.

“Hillary Clinton has been fighting for progressive values for decades and she has shown us all that she is ready to lead our country as we face enormous challenges.”

California, one of the many states to move up its primary to February 5, will likely play a key role in determining the presidential nominees.

Related Stories: Barack Obama visited Alameda last week to ask if he's Black Enough? My guess is yes (just enough for Dems to nominate Hillary). However, expect Condoleezza Rice to be the First Lady in the White House (NOT a "First Lady," but the First Lady President). Trust the Green Party to find a way to get their Man elected, even if "The Man" is Condi, Not George W. Al Gore, enjoy your Oscar as a lovely consolation prize. Condi, a Stanford alum, attended funeral services for football legend, Coach Bill Walsh today - RIP.

More Coverage: San Jose Merc, ABC 7, and GavinWatch.

Hi My Name Is Chicken John

Posted by Scott Beale of Laughing Squid.com

Chicken John has placed the following full-page ad (here’s a larger version) on page 19 of the August 8th edition of the San Francisco Bay Guardian. Chicken, who is running for Mayor of San Francisco, needs to raise $5000 by 5pm this Friday, August 10th in order to be on the ballot.

In the ad, Chicken is asking our current mayor, Gavin Newsom, to help contribute to his campaign, so that Gavin will have an opponent in the election (Chicken promises not to win). Do you think Gavin will go for it?

Here’s Chicken’s write-up on his fundraising efforts, including his recommendations for donation amounts.

To drive the point home, I’ve been writing some random things. I’ll include a few here. These are some ideas on why or how you should nudge some greenbacks my way:

  • If you had a friend that had to move away from SF because it was too expensive, send me $20 per friend.
  • If you are an artist and never considered that the Arts Commission of SF represents you, send me $10.
  • If you or someone you know lost a car to being towed and you owed too many parking tickets send me $25 per lost car.
  • If you or someone you know was involved in an art space that was shut down by the city send me $37.
  • If you would like to make a few busses run on gasified coffee grinds send me 10 bucks.
  • If you don’t like that bow and arrow bullshit on the embarkadero send me 10 cents. (that’ll be a few hundred thousand dollars.).
  • If you think that our mayor needs to be challenged on issues involving the arts, too many cars and being intolerant to inovation and new ideas send me $20.
  • If you feel like you are disenfranchised and unrepresented send me $40.
  • If you feel like the green campaign that the city is force feeding SF is actually greenwashing, send me $10.
  • If you want to help Chicken with his campaign to become Mayor of San Francisco, you can donate online via PayPal.

Gavin Newsom Smashing Pumpkins

The Great Pumpkin will skip San Francisco this year.

Gavin Newsom has declared there will be no official Halloween celebration anywhere in San Francisco in October - not in the Castro neighborhood, the traditional home of the event, and not at a parking lot near AT&T Park, which had been considered as an alternate site.

City officials are still trying to prevent any festivities in the Castro. On Wednesday, Supervisor Bevan Dufty sent a letter to 110 owners of bars, restaurants and stores in the Castro, asking them to close shop on Halloween night to discourage partygoers.

The Halloween event was marred by violence last year after the shooting near the main stage on Market Street. Another person was injured as the crowd fled the area. Dufty and other city leaders had already been concerned about violence at the event, including the potential for attacks on members of the city's gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender population.

Halloween traditionally has been a major community event - sometimes referred to as the "Gay Christmas" - but Dufty said that era has passed.

"It's not a holiday in the Castro. It's a night in which the neighborhood is overrun by people who come to gawk, not celebrate, and unfortunately it turns into gang night out in the Castro."
To quell the Castro event, which draws several hundred thousand people, no roads will be closed, no barriers will be erected and no portable bathrooms will be set up, Dufty said. Police will be out in numbers akin to last Halloween, but they will be patrolling with "zero tolerance" for anyone breaking the law, he said.

Dufty has commitments from five businesses in the Castro to close on Halloween night, and he will try to persuade more to do so at a community meeting in the neighborhood next week.

San Francisco Chronicle : No Castro Halloween This Year, And No Official S.F. Alternative by Wyatt Buchanan

Newsom vs. Newsom

As posted by SF Party Party.com:

As of today at 5pm, the line up for November looks like “Newsom vs. Newsom”. Of course, we already knew the out come when the six million dollar mayor bought his razor thin margin last time: downtown money was not about to let Newsom lose to a progressive.

What we didn’t already know was whether there would be any dialog about the issues: homicides, muni, police reform, housing? Would anyone step forward and hold Newsom accountable to his own record.

Aside from the dialog, a competitor would have gotten us three months of good government…. three months every four years. Thats not much, but it would have been better than nothing. Street cleaners would come from nowhere. Parks would get clean. The homeless would get hidden somewhere, some how. Maybe Newsom would even rollup his sleeves and help prevent another Halloween debacle. Maybe.

The things that a contested campaign will get an incumbent to do, even a lazy incompetent incumbent. We were among the hopeful.

Democracy wasn’t served when Newsom bought his election with New York money in 2003, nor will it be served when he runs unopposed this November.

Newsom doesn’t need your money or your vote, and he certainly hasn’t earned. So don’t give it to him:

“Vote None of the Above” this November.

image credit: Clinton Fein 2007

Wednesday, August 8, 2007

Chris Daly, Running for Mayor

The Tenderloin’s own Board Member Dissident and Dally Lama of Derelique’d [laughing] my ass [off], Chris Daly, says he is considering stepping up and out from understudy to Matt Gonzalez, Ross Mirkarimi and whichever neo-hippy intern in the Regressive mail room too smart to challenge Gavin Newsom in this November’s mayoral race.

Let get this straight, the most hated and least successful of all the limp-wrist, salad-eaters has won the opportunity to lose to an incumbent mayor with 78% approval ratings. Sounds like an email the spam I got this morning from the Igor of the Ukraine announcing that I’ve just won… “Send yoo sochell secretary number and mathr’s maiden naime to clame yoo pri3e – Xopowo!”

“At this point, if there were a bigger name challenger to Newsom in the fall it
would be me.”
Back in June, Daly said he wouldn't run, but Daly says things changed when Gonzalez, who nearly beat Newsom in 2003, announced he wouldn’t run last week (In reality, it was months ago). Gonzalez, a Green Party member, was widely considered the best candidate to mount a challenge to Newsom from the left. Without a viable progressive contender in the mayor’s race, Daly says, “I’ve obviously been talking to close friends and allies about what that means for us.”
Friends? Allies? Name one! Even Josh Low, Daly's brother-in-law, says he's unqualified!
Daly says he and his allies are debating whether it would be better for the city’s progressive movement for him to run against Newsom or to just sit it out and focus on maintaining the leftist majority on the 11-member board of supervisors (all who hate Daly) in 2008. Several supervisor seats are up next year.
Gavin’s got to be pulling him. Nothing sets off a good tan like
an albino sitting nearby!
One thing is certain; we won’t have to wait long to learn if the newly crowned king in the confederacy of dunces may soon be collecting his prize. The candidate-filing deadline is 5 p.m. this upcoming Friday.

SF Weekly: Daly Reconsidering Run For Mayor by Will Harper

Tuesday, August 7, 2007

SFist On Wrong Side of Warm Water Cove

SFist takes artistic license too far south to new low describing the graffiti clean-up near Potrero Hill as, “what was the south wing of the graffiti artist "gallery" at Warm Water Cove is now a pristine green monster of a wall with no tagging at all.”

A couple of responses come to mind; yet, like graffiti, neither of which is legal. Firstly, instant notoriety is cheap, so earn your initials! If anyone wants to tag a Green Monster, come see me on 'game day.' I’m an avid J.E.T.S. fan with a rigid body painting ritual. Speaking of green, how 'bout the immortal words of Peter Tosh:

“Don’t criticize it; legalize it!”
If you prefer a graffiti gallery to a dog park, then 'man up' and 'make a buck.' Charge by the cover or charge by the can. Host parties, celebrate artist and upcoming bands. Who knows? Who cares?

I don’t. Instead, I care about vandals who think they're fucking with 'the man' when they're only fucking over themseves (and us). Grow up, our youth can have a childhood. It's no fun explaining why some jackass painted penis or "N" word on a wall to impressionable young minds. Consider yourself lucky Gavin Newsom and his Graffiti Czar, Officer Putts, installed cameras, because they're the only thing protecting you from me. And, you don’t want to fuck with me.
I'LL SHOVE THAT CAN STRAIGHT UP YOUR AEROSOL!
Wake up! This is America, the home of free will and enterprise. Stop infringing on others rights and take advantage of few of your own. Start a business, you can charge assholes like me to see the shit you do!

SFist: Warm Water Cove Going To The Dogs by Jim

Photo Credit: SFist. An SFPD cruiser backs out from the cove after responding to a report of possible taggers in the area.

Monday, August 6, 2007

Art Imitates Life

Both Josh Wolf ($5,000) and Chicken John ($4,300) need a considerable amount of donations by Friday or, as Chicken says, "This journey will be over."

Neither would debate they have no shot of beating the incumbent Mayor Gavin Newsom who enjoys 78 percent approval, $1.5 million in campaign funds. The people of San Francisco have spoken, homeless, homicides and hypodermic needles in the park are just fine by us… as long as we get our daily fill of Gavin’s pearly whites splashed across the 11:00 O’clock News.

Wolf: "Everything I put forward I'm serious about as a candidate... But I'd be out to lunch to think I'm going to win this thing."
Therefore, why debate the public health system? The economy? Or, why run?

Chicken: "This is a performance. You're in the city of arts and innovation right now!"
Wolf: "I'd rather you make art than watch the crap on television."
Wolf wants open city government. He'll wear a video cam. Chicken encourages more dramedy in board meetings. "The whole Jerry Springer element (Chris Daly) is bringing to City Hall is long overdue." Suggests a juggler for five minutes at each meeting as well as the sound guy, K-Rob, produce a soundtrack for each meeting.

Chicken John regarding the murder rate:

"I don't feel qualified to answer this question. I have no idea. There are experts out there... I don't know [Much stammering]. If art became our focus people would be nicer to each other."
He should have quit there as the next question regarding the homeless problem produced this gem:

"If what you're interested in is not seeing homeless people, then go f---yourself."
No, he should go sleep with the homeless. I don't sleep with men, but far prefer Josh's comments regarding gay marriage:

"Gay marriage doesn't exist, and he did that a long time ago--and not much more. Some one needs to call him to the carpet."
At this point art imitates life (the candidates) as the audience regresses with lame questions like: Do you prefer DC or Marvel Comics? Or, is the City too expensive for creative people?

Chicken: "Don't need to spend money. All that needs to happen is have more
people support arts by becoming an artist."

Wolf: "I don't have the answer right now." Co-ops are a start. Communal living cab cut costs, especially if city helps dole out low cost loans."
All right, I was a little harsh, but I'm still pissed off by the Chicken and the Homeless quote. My point (actually their point) is, they’re not to be taken seriously. They’re artists and very entertaining! As much, each has an opportunity to influence the minds of the many and thus government policy - plus, the balls to run!

My vote is Chicken should stick to making a car run on coffee grinds. God forbid he uses a sidewalk and visits this homeless epidemic up close and personally. Josh Wolf wins by default.

Good luck to both. I hope they stick around. Say hello and send some dough!

Complete Article: Chicken (John) v. Wolf (Josh) Mayoral Debate By: Justin Berton (Email)

Sunday, August 5, 2007

HOMO(RED)

Whoops! Freudiant Mispelling. With Barry Bonds' All-Time Homer tying blast last night, I thought to commemorate the milestone with another from the vault.

You may recall Gavin Newsom canceled an appearance celebrating TV host Conan O’Brien’s visit to San Francisco to give an interview to ESPN’s “SportsCenter” about Barry Bonds in preparation for the San Francisco Giants’ slugger breaking Hall of Famer Hank Aaron’s career home run record of 755.

In return, O’Brien joked about receiving flowers from Newsom. “When I tried to thank him, he said, ‘They’re for your wife,’” O’Brien said, referencing Newsom’s dalliance with former campaign manager Alex Tourk’s wife, Ruby Rippey-Tourk, for which the mayor has publicly apologized.

We will be sure to add the interview as soon as it aires. Meantime, best wishes to both Barrys and the rest of the Giants in the upcoming homestand. We’ll see you around McCovey Cove.

Bonds Coverage: CBS5, Chron, SJ Merc.

New York Minute: Tom Glavine joins fellow Miracle Met and Tom "Terrific" [Seaver] with his 300 win tonight. Speaking of winning ways, Alex Rodriguez slams home 500 and Yankees fanatic and mayoral genius, Rudy Giuliani, joins Republican hopefuls at the Iowa Debates. Can we move the White House to the Tenderloin?

Saturday, August 4, 2007

Graffiti Party at Chicken John's

Today, as promised, San Francisco's Warm Water Cove, aka Tire Beach, aka Toxic Beach got a fresh new coat of paint. Mayoral candidate, Chicken John Rinaldi, weighes in on the whitewashing.

I completely disagree. My retirement plan includes a three-wheeled bicycle with a basket-full-o-paint... sponsored by Frazee to "white out" careless mistakes intended to voice protest or tag ones's ego to a wall, but only serve to erode the esteem, hearts and minds of the community with each step towards the playground, work or worship.

Graffiti is as welcome as a sidewalk Jesus with a megaphone. If we want it, we'll pay for it. Chicken John should step off his soap box and put his walls where his mouth is… home sweet home. This is our (The City) house. We will protected our house! I say we pay John a visit at the Chicken Ranch to stencil, pen and paint what we want, when we want, where we want. I doubt very much he'll enjoy my genius at work (mural above the headboard).

If one's confused about a graffiti and art, a good rule of thumb is too look for a price tag. Graffiti costs us all. Real graffti art is framed and hung on a wall. Check out Brian B’s work at Rye at 688 Geary Street or rent the movie Basquiat or swing by my place and I'll show you my Bornacelli.

Cocaine Intervention Planned For Mayor

In light of numerous rumors and allegations of Mayor Gavin Newsom’s cocaine use, Fog City Journal would like to hear from anyone who has witnessed the mayor using cocaine, or witnessed the mayor purchasing cocaine since he has been an elected official.

While Newsom has pointedly denied all rumors of alleged cocaine use, Fog City Journal asserts, if an elected official has blatanty lied to the electorate, voters have a right to know.

So, they want to know. All correspondence will be treated in the strictest of confidence. Fog City Journal reserves the right to verify any and all claims with the assurance that names will not be mentioned, or published, for your protection. They only seek to publish accounts that we have verified and are one hundred percent satisfied are true.

If you got bad news, you wanna kick them blues; cocaine.

When your day is done and you wanna run; cocaine.

She don't lie, she don't lie, she don't lie; cocaine.

Email all correspondence to editor@fogcityjournal.com.

Fog City Journal: Innocent Until Proven Guilty

Mayoral Debate: Chicken or the Wolf?

With little more than a week before the filing deadline, mayoral candidates “Chicken John” Rinaldi and Josh Wolf have announced a joint fundraiser to help raise the necessary money to secure their status on the ballot. The highly anticipated Chicken v. Wolf debate will square off two of the most talked about, most controversial mayoral candidates and be moderated by permit consultant Jeremy Paul.

The debate will feature questions from the audience and streamed live over the Internet for those unable to attend.


· Where: Chez Poulet 3359 Cesar Chavez St. (near Mission).
· When Monday at 9:00 PM

A $10 suggested donation will be taken at the door, but supporters are encouraged to donate up to $500 to either or both candidates at the event.

See you there.