GAVIN'S MUST SEE TV

Mayor Gavin Newsom and Fox Broadcasting Company agreed to terms today greenlighting 24 episodes of Gav 4 Guv.

Newsom said he's considered television since his marriage to Court TV Queen Kimberly Guilfoyle and throughout courtships with Reality TV Stars Erin Brodie and Paris Hilton as well as CSI's Sofia Milos. This one simply fit.

Newsom insists that his television aspirations are independent of any open government reality television projects concepts proposed by rival mayoral candidate and video blogger, Josh Wolf, who if elected promises 24/7 Reality Government.

My life has always been an open book. Reality TV affords us a new medium with a new chapter. In a nutshell, it’s kind of like The Apprentice meets The Crocodile Hunter meets Real World meets The Bachelor without the all the Harry Potter.

• The Apprentice - only imagine forced resignations citywide in which Department Heads are required to partake in a number of team on team contests designed to raise campaign dollars for the Gav 4 Guv campaign and members of the winning team earn the right to interview for their old job - you're hired!

• The Crocodile Hunter - only imagine a gatored community in which contestants are tasked with bagging and tagging dangerous and always unpredictable crack addicts indigenous to the Tenderloin and Civic Center neighborhoods as part of a Catch and Release program tracking homeless with homing devices.

• Real World - only imagine Gavin and love interest Jennifer Siebel share a posh victorian on Russian Hill with supervisers Chris Daly and Bevan Dufty and old socialite chums Billy Getty and wife Vanessa as well as former couple Alex Tourk and Ruby rippey-Tourk and ex-wife Kimberly Guilfoyle and husband Eric Villency and baby boy. Watch Gavin's psyche unravel as Booze, Cocaine and Extra Extra-Marital Affairs prevail. Oh, and ...hold it, hold it... add new age author and gay-lovin-gone-bad stalker Han Shin into the mix. Stir with Deep Purple latex gloves.

• The Bachelor - only imagine, half the ladies are single and the rest married and thier husbands are not only permitted on the set, it's encouraged. In fact, one or two may be part of the crew. Brittanie Mountz versus Ruby Rippey-Tourk? Stay tuned!

Not everyone shares Newsom's enthusiasm. Newsom neighsayer, Chris Daly, predicts "A Big Fat Obnoxious Disappointment."

Gavin Newsom Videography:

• Would Gavin Lie to You
• The Walkway Mayor
• Gavin Newsom and the Man Code
• Gavin's Meltdown