Chris Daly Blog: Awaiting Moderation.

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Sidewalk Super Heroes

Have you mugged your liberal today?

That’s what it’s gonna take turn their vapidly inflated minds around. They're getting on my last NIRVANA. Vegans walking to work. Patting themselves on the wallet for a job well done. Transcendentally levitating over the homeless who live on our sidewalks. Shelter one and another 100 will show up at your door. Like treating syphilis sores with iodine.

Why change our oil, when you can loosen the lamp indicator on your dashboard? Pop Aspirin in place of root canal? Or, dial 311 Non-Emergency? Does Dominoes deliver on Super Bowl Sunday? Yes, if you order on Saturday. Like SFPD, they’re overwhelmed and undermanned. The City's set up to answer on the first ring and no show.

May I please get the cross streets and a description of the suspect defecating
in your doorway? Thanks. We’ve only two delivery vehicles on duty; we’ll get to
your order as soon as soon we humanly can.

The reality bites! It's time to crossover to the land of make believe where two demensional comicbook can help you from point A to B. While Gavin tackles water bottles, plastic bags and chewing gum, artfully sidestepping real issues like homeless and homicides with aplomb, our Sidewalk Superheroes will battle for clean, safe streets.

Introducing:

The Mayor: whose plastic powers can dissolve chewing gum on contact. Slimy hair gel can lube him into and out of the stickiest of high-viscosity breakdowns.

The Chief: can make herself disappear in any crisis situation. Then, just like magic – presto! She magically resurfaces out from under Gavin’s body shield for another photo shoot.

The Sanitizer: mild mannered Travis Bickle, by day turns to scrubbing bubbles at the first sign of trouble. Prepared to sit, spin and wash all the scum off the streets of San Francisco.

The Sidewalk Czar: clad in naru jacket and fez with clean straight lines and not an unnecessary pocket out of place wields with zero-tolerance iron fist to crush any obstacle in your daily march from panhandlers to sidewalk signs… signs… signs, everywhere is signs.

The Sidewalk Surfer: can slalom with graceful ease to carve through chalk outlines of homeless and crowds of tourist who can’t KEEP RIGHT! Look for him to sail onto bookshelves soon, shredding and threading together strangest of adventures in upcoming Sidewalk Super Heroes: ‘The Vigilante,’ ‘Bum Squad’ and ‘Trany Spotting.’

Josh Wolf In Liberal's Clothing?

Video blogger, Josh Wolf has announced his candidacy. Admittedly, he's a little to left of the radio dial for my liking, although he does list homicides and homeless in his top three priorities. You would think the more homes built, the less homeless on our sidewalks? Unfortunately, that's not true. In any case, he is certainly well spoken and on top of his game in the following interview with a formidable opponent, Stephen Colbert.



Josh needs to gather about 10,000 signatures or $5,000 by the beginning of August to qualify for the ballot. Check out Josh's website to get him a signature.

Newsom Signs S.F.P.D. Pay Raise

Amid concerns over San Francisco’s high crime and homicide rate, a contract with the Police Department granting a 24 percent pay raise during a four-year period was approved.

The contract approval, in a 10-1 vote by the Board of Supervisors, came as the Mayor’s Office announced a plan to combat summer violence.

Of course, Chris Daly was the only naysayer when the Board of Supervisors voted on the contract. Doughboy Daly said he opposed the contract because it gives to much money to police officers at the expense of preventative programs.

I gather Daly's 5-point plan would be to pin a star on the homeless. At least
then we’d have a cop on every corner.

Mayor Gavin Newsom signed an executive directive that calls on the Police Department to “enhance all available law enforcement resources to summer ‘hotspots,’” which includes locations in the Bayview, Mission, Tenderloin and Western Addition neighborhoods. The directive also establishes the so-called Summer Street Violence Prevention Council, to work with communities affected by violence.

Newsom’s directive said that while The City is engaged in developing a long-term plan to prevent violence, “increased action is needed immediately to stem recent gun violence.”

Supervisor Ross Mirkarimi, whose District 5 has been plagued with gun violence, said he welcomed the directive, “but let us not kid ourselves.”

“It has already been a bloody summer. Why do we have to go through three summers of this? I expect more from The City, such as coming up with a plan many months in advance of summer.”

Mirkarimi was referring to recent years of record-breaking homicide rates — with The City tallying 85 homicides in 2006; 96 in 2005; and 88 in 2004. In the summers of 2004 and 2006, more than 20 homicides were registered.

The Mayor’s Office and the San Francisco Police Officers’ Association said the pay raise, which would result in a total of $63 million in salary increases during the four-year period, is needed to stay competitive with area police departments such as Oakland and San Jose. They say the department is operating more than 200 officers below voter-mandated levels.

“Time and time again what we hear from recruits is, ‘I don’t want to become a cop in that crazy town.’ So we better pay them right to come here and to deal with the political climate that we must deal with on a daily basis.” - POA president Gary Delagnes

Complete Article: Anti-violence plan nets hefty pay hike for S.F. cops by Joshua Sabatini, The Examiner

Mayor Amits To Affair With News Anchor

When L.A. news anchor reported that Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa was splitting from his wife she had some inside information - she was the other woman in an illicit love triangle.

Villaraigosa confessed yesterday he has been romancing Spanish-language TV anchor Mirthala Salinas for at least a year, shedding new light on why his wife filed for divorce three weeks ago.
Villaraigosa, 54, announced his affair with the Telemundo anchor, who has reported on him for her station, at a news conference after a local paper spilled the secret.

"I have a relationship with Ms. Salinas and I take full responsibility for my
actions."

Salinas, 35, went on the air June 8 with news of the mayor's marital split. "The rumors are true," a poker-faced Salinas said in Spanish. "Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa confirmed today that he is separating from his wife, Corina, after more than 20 years of marriage."

What Salinas did not say was that she and Villaraigosa were having a torrid affair.

While admitting the affair yesterday, the mayor denied rumors that the popular newscaster is carrying his child. "I can tell you emphatically that that question is outrageous and the answer is no, she is not pregnant," he said.

Villaraigosa didn't give details about the romance but admitted it got serious sometime last year.
In 2005, Villaraigosa became the city's first Latino mayor since 1872, and it's no secret that he has his eye on the California governor's mansion. The Democrat has been raising his national profile with frequent lobbying trips to Capitol Hill.

Some political observers say the mayor's behavior is crass, but probably won't hurt his long-term ambitions.

It wasn't clear whether the burgeoning romance would change the politico's last name. The former Tony Villar blended his name with that of his wife, Corina Raigosa, 49.

Reporters noticed the mayor's wedding band was missing several months ago, but, at the time, he insisted things at Getty House, the mayor's official residence, were fine.

The father of four yesterday described his gal pal as "a consummate journalistic professional."
About a year ago, Salinas decided "our friendship had grown to a point where it was necessary to inform her management that she shouldn't cover me," he said.

His estranged wife, an educator, has been mum on her marital problems, citing "irreconcilable differences" in her divorce filing.

She has remained in the mayor's residence with the kids; he has moved out.

Complete Article: Straying L.A. mayor confesses to affair with TV news anchor by Michelle Caruso, NY Daily News.com

Too Chicken To Run For Mayor?

While the Regressives sit and spin, "The sky is falling," a new candidate flys without fear, over the cuckoos's nest and under the radar to offer the people a choice.

Which do you prefer the original fake chicken Gavin Newsom or the new crispy creator of burning man, Chicken John?

It's no yolk, folks. We've got a full-fledged cock-fight on or hands.

While we know how the other Candidates De Jure stack up versus incubant Mayor McChicken:

• The Nudist - Bigger Schlong?


• The Conservative - Bigger Cohones?


• The Homeless Guy - Nothing to lose.

We don't know much about how challenger Chicken John measures up in the tale of the tape? Except that he drives a compost-burning pickup truck and was the owner of the Odeon bar... and that we hope to see more of this colorful character.

My platform? What’s my platform, you ask? The bed of 1975 GMC pick ‘em up truck that runs on coffee grinds. Party affiliation? I like to party. Party hardy. Issues? What about the issues? We’ll get to that later. For now, I need to get on the ballot. I need your help.

Here’s how this works: You download the pdf forms FRONT AND BACK ON THE SAME PAGE.

• Front Page


• Back Page

NOTE: 2 DOWNLOADS ON 1 PIECE OF PAPER OR THEY WON’T ACCEPT IT.

Ahem. You get friends or whoever you can to sign it, follow the instructions. You yourself need to be a registered voter in San Francisco WITH A VALID VOTER THINGY WITH YOUR CORRECT ADDRESS. You get as many people to sign as possible. 10,000 signatures is a lot.

Only people who are registered voters in SF can sign. They check. You write [Chiken John] email and drop off the signatures before the 25th of July. They are due on the 26th.

Complete Article: Finally, a real chicken for mayor by Left in SF

Gay Shame

San Francisco owes a huge debt of gratitude to Miles O’Reilly. The owner and namesake of O’Reilly’s, a popular Irish pub in North Beach, has staked $6.5 million into the Holy Grail, a restaurant on lower Polk Gulch – an area largely known as a seedy spot for drug dealers, hustlers and homeless.

O’Reilly says, “I put my life savings into making a statement on this street. Polk is one of the most prominent streets in the City. We are trying to rejuvenate this area, and it already seems to have taken a turn for the better.”

Consequently, Lee Cole recently decided to put a new coat of paint on the Polk Street building that houses his roller skate store, saying he wanted the place to look nicer to fit in.

“Miles O’Reilly is a man who cannot look at ugliness. He changed the neighborhood overnight.”

Carolyn Abst, current chair of the Lower Polk Neighbors Association, said O'Reilly had taken a big gamble on the neighborhood and was exactly the type of business she wanted.

"We are not trying to be like Chestnut or Union, though we do want people to come here and feel safe. We are just kind of about cleaning up our act. We want a fruit stand, and we'll take a Starbucks, too."

Incredibly, an activist group known as Gay Shame that champions “radical queers” has the gaul to charge gentrification is pushing the out ‘hookers, hustlers, drug addicts, homeless, trannies, needle exchange services and social deviants.”

• The Polk Gulch Saloon, a renowned place for drag queens and transsexuals, is now the chic Lush Lounge, which serves bright-colored cocktails and caters to the happy-hour crowd.


• Reflections, a place where johns were known to drink, is now a dance club called Vertigo that brings in DJs and young clubbers.
  
• The Hemlock, a hangout with live bands and lots of local hipsters, replaced the historic gay bar The Giraffe.


• Rendezvous, the last male hustler bar in the neighborhood, closed about six months ago, and a wine bar called SNOB opened a few doors down.

One member of the group who identified himself as Mary says:

“Polk Street is one the last remaining places there has been cross-class, cross-gender and cross-sexuality, an interaction between street cultures. To see that steadily replaced by high-end destinations for partying suburbanites is really heartbreaking and intolerant.”

Boo-Hoo, Boiz-2-Gurlz. No one’s showing Scary Mary the door. Just watching her scurry cross the floor for the corner. Hey babe, Why cry over a fresh coat of paint? Take a walk on the mild side. Ask your johns to pay a buck or two to get his kicks for you. Or, set sail to Oakland to cast away to castaway drunks and downtrodden as well as pussies like you who want dick, but don’t have the balls to solicit in their own neighborhoods.

Celebrate Halloween every night as always, just don’t bitch about clean, safe streets and a promising economy… when you really mean you want your tricks and treat on the cheap. Adapt or perish. And, it wouldn't kill ya to try some home repairs of your own... mascara touch up for midnight masquerades or a couple coats of foundation to play trannequin in the light of day. It’s time to renovate, not pontificate.

Complete Aricles:

• Polk Gulch Cleanup Angers Some - Gentrification Pushing Out 'Hookers, Hustlers' by Leslie Fulbright, Chronicle Staff Writer
  
• It Takes a Village to Shoot Smack by SFist