Gavin Newsom’s Victory Happy Hour!

The website was created in the aftermath of the mayor’s City Hall Sex Scandal in an effort to elicit more responsible leadership and a more conservative approach to long-time chronic homelessness and homicides growing exponentially.

Since that time, the mayor has acknowledged his apathy and revitalized his policy to include competitive pay for police, community courts, and swept our parks to quell TB, AIDs & Malaria.

Like Michael Moore, Gavin Newsom Sucks.com has flip-flopped its position and is hosting a Re-election Happy Hour at Balboa Café in his Honor’s honor.

Here’s to honor. Getting on her and staying on her!

• Balboa Café/Plumpjack


• 3199 Fillmore Street (at Greenwich)


• San Francisco, CA 94123


• Thursday, August 16th

We were not surprised to learn the Regressive Convention, although the biggest assembly of limp wrist salad-eaters since the Nixon era, produced zero candidates. Bleeding-panty politics-as-usual suspects like Chris Daly, Ross Mirkarimi, and Matt Gonzalez took a peek at Gavin’s 78% approval ratings showing and quickly folded before the flop.

With nothing but static to the Left of the radio dial and all smiles on the Right (except Tony “The Tiger” Hall), Gavin is just four years away from a bigger office with a constituency far outside the City, not to mention far more conservative and far less forgiving.

In other words, we can finally tackle the Quality-of-Life problems that have long plagued San Francisco draining our City of tourism, taxes and good times!

Here's to keeping the Hippies and Hypocrites in their vegitative state. The Vegans are finally food's food. Reactionaries Unite!

Thank God! My ‘soul’ goal is clean, safe streets. I’ve got some good ideas. Do you? If so, bring ‘em with and we’ll tip some Plumpjack.

Gavin Newsom Endorses Hillary Clinton

Gavin Newsom endorsed Hillary Clinton's presidential bid Friday, the latest in a string of prominent Californians who are throwing their support behind the New York Democrat.

Newsom will co-chair the campaign with Los Angeles Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa who officially endorsed Clinton's bid last May. The senator has also won endorsements from California Sen. Dianne Feinstein, California Rep. Jane Harman, and Assembly Speaker Fabian Nunez.

Of course, you recall Villaraigosa, like Newsom, has been the subject of a City Hall sex scandal, having admitted to an extramarital affair last month.

“Hillary Clinton has been fighting for progressive values for decades and she has shown us all that she is ready to lead our country as we face enormous challenges.”

California, one of the many states to move up its primary to February 5, will likely play a key role in determining the presidential nominees.

Related Stories: Barack Obama visited Alameda last week to ask if he's Black Enough? My guess is yes (just enough for Dems to nominate Hillary). However, expect Condoleezza Rice to be the First Lady in the White House (NOT a "First Lady," but the First Lady President). Trust the Green Party to find a way to get their Man elected, even if "The Man" is Condi, Not George W. Al Gore, enjoy your Oscar as a lovely consolation prize. Condi, a Stanford alum, attended funeral services for football legend, Coach Bill Walsh today - RIP.

More Coverage: San Jose Merc, ABC 7, and GavinWatch.

Hi My Name Is Chicken John

Posted by Scott Beale of Laughing Squid.com

Chicken John has placed the following full-page ad (here’s a larger version) on page 19 of the August 8th edition of the San Francisco Bay Guardian. Chicken, who is running for Mayor of San Francisco, needs to raise $5000 by 5pm this Friday, August 10th in order to be on the ballot.

In the ad, Chicken is asking our current mayor, Gavin Newsom, to help contribute to his campaign, so that Gavin will have an opponent in the election (Chicken promises not to win). Do you think Gavin will go for it?

Here’s Chicken’s write-up on his fundraising efforts, including his recommendations for donation amounts.

To drive the point home, I’ve been writing some random things. I’ll include a few here. These are some ideas on why or how you should nudge some greenbacks my way:

• If you had a friend that had to move away from SF because it was too expensive, send me $20 per friend.
• If you are an artist and never considered that the Arts Commission of SF represents you, send me $10.
• If you or someone you know lost a car to being towed and you owed too many parking tickets send me $25 per lost car.
• If you or someone you know was involved in an art space that was shut down by the city send me $37.
• If you would like to make a few busses run on gasified coffee grinds send me 10 bucks.
• If you don’t like that bow and arrow bullshit on the embarkadero send me 10 cents. (that’ll be a few hundred thousand dollars.).
• If you think that our mayor needs to be challenged on issues involving the arts, too many cars and being intolerant to inovation and new ideas send me $20.
• If you feel like you are disenfranchised and unrepresented send me $40.
• If you feel like the green campaign that the city is force feeding SF is actually greenwashing, send me $10.
• If you want to help Chicken with his campaign to become Mayor of San Francisco, you can donate online via PayPal.

Gavin Newsom Smashing Pumpkins

The Great Pumpkin will skip San Francisco this year.

Gavin Newsom has declared there will be no official Halloween celebration anywhere in San Francisco in October - not in the Castro neighborhood, the traditional home of the event, and not at a parking lot near AT&T Park, which had been considered as an alternate site.

City officials are still trying to prevent any festivities in the Castro. On Wednesday, Supervisor Bevan Dufty sent a letter to 110 owners of bars, restaurants and stores in the Castro, asking them to close shop on Halloween night to discourage partygoers.

The Halloween event was marred by violence last year after the shooting near the main stage on Market Street. Another person was injured as the crowd fled the area. Dufty and other city leaders had already been concerned about violence at the event, including the potential for attacks on members of the city's gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender population.

Halloween traditionally has been a major community event - sometimes referred to as the "Gay Christmas" - but Dufty said that era has passed.

"It's not a holiday in the Castro. It's a night in which the neighborhood is overrun by people who come to gawk, not celebrate, and unfortunately it turns into gang night out in the Castro."

To quell the Castro event, which draws several hundred thousand people, no roads will be closed, no barriers will be erected and no portable bathrooms will be set up, Dufty said. Police will be out in numbers akin to last Halloween, but they will be patrolling with "zero tolerance" for anyone breaking the law, he said.

Dufty has commitments from five businesses in the Castro to close on Halloween night, and he will try to persuade more to do so at a community meeting in the neighborhood next week.

San Francisco Chronicle : No Castro Halloween This Year, And No Official S.F. Alternative by Wyatt Buchanan

Newsom vs. Newsom

As posted by SF Party Party.com:

As of today at 5pm, the line up for November looks like “Newsom vs. Newsom”. Of course, we already knew the out come when the six million dollar mayor bought his razor thin margin last time: downtown money was not about to let Newsom lose to a progressive.

What we didn’t already know was whether there would be any dialog about the issues: homicides, muni, police reform, housing? Would anyone step forward and hold Newsom accountable to his own record.

Aside from the dialog, a competitor would have gotten us three months of good government…. three months every four years. Thats not much, but it would have been better than nothing. Street cleaners would come from nowhere. Parks would get clean. The homeless would get hidden somewhere, some how. Maybe Newsom would even rollup his sleeves and help prevent another Halloween debacle. Maybe.

The things that a contested campaign will get an incumbent to do, even a lazy incompetent incumbent. We were among the hopeful.

Democracy wasn’t served when Newsom bought his election with New York money in 2003, nor will it be served when he runs unopposed this November.

Newsom doesn’t need your money or your vote, and he certainly hasn’t earned. So don’t give it to him:

“Vote None of the Above” this November.

image credit: Clinton Fein 2007

Chris Daly, Running for Mayor

The Tenderloin’s own Board Member Dissident and Dally Lama of Derelique’d [laughing] my ass [off], Chris Daly, says he is considering stepping up and out from understudy to Matt Gonzalez, Ross Mirkarimi and whichever neo-hippy intern in the Regressive mail room too smart to challenge Gavin Newsom in this November’s mayoral race.

Let get this straight, the most hated and least successful of all the limp-wrist, salad-eaters has won the opportunity to lose to an incumbent mayor with 78% approval ratings. Sounds like an email the spam I got this morning from the Igor of the Ukraine announcing that I’ve just won… “Send yoo sochell secretary number and mathr’s maiden naime to clame yoo pri3e – Xopowo!”

“At this point, if there were a bigger name challenger to Newsom in the fall it
would be me.”

Back in June, Daly said he wouldn't run, but Daly says things changed when Gonzalez, who nearly beat Newsom in 2003, announced he wouldn’t run last week (In reality, it was months ago). Gonzalez, a Green Party member, was widely considered the best candidate to mount a challenge to Newsom from the left. Without a viable progressive contender in the mayor’s race, Daly says, “I’ve obviously been talking to close friends and allies about what that means for us.”

Friends? Allies? Name one! Even Josh Low, Daly's brother-in-law, says he's unqualified!

Daly says he and his allies are debating whether it would be better for the city’s progressive movement for him to run against Newsom or to just sit it out and focus on maintaining the leftist majority on the 11-member board of supervisors (all who hate Daly) in 2008. Several supervisor seats are up next year.

Gavin’s got to be pulling him. Nothing sets off a good tan like
an albino sitting nearby!

One thing is certain; we won’t have to wait long to learn if the newly crowned king in the confederacy of dunces may soon be collecting his prize. The candidate-filing deadline is 5 p.m. this upcoming Friday.

SF Weekly: Daly Reconsidering Run For Mayor by Will Harper

SFist On Wrong Side of Warm Water Cove

SFist takes artistic license too far south to new low describing the graffiti clean-up near Potrero Hill as, “what was the south wing of the graffiti artist "gallery" at Warm Water Cove is now a pristine green monster of a wall with no tagging at all.”

A couple of responses come to mind; yet, like graffiti, neither of which is legal. Firstly, instant notoriety is cheap, so earn your initials! If anyone wants to tag a Green Monster, come see me on 'game day.' I’m an avid J.E.T.S. fan with a rigid body painting ritual. Speaking of green, how 'bout the immortal words of Peter Tosh:

“Don’t criticize it; legalize it!”

If you prefer a graffiti gallery to a dog park, then 'man up' and 'make a buck.' Charge by the cover or charge by the can. Host parties, celebrate artist and upcoming bands. Who knows? Who cares?

I don’t. Instead, I care about vandals who think they're fucking with 'the man' when they're only fucking over themseves (and us). Grow up, our youth can have a childhood. It's no fun explaining why some jackass painted penis or "N" word on a wall to impressionable young minds. Consider yourself lucky Gavin Newsom and his Graffiti Czar, Officer Putts, installed cameras, because they're the only thing protecting you from me. And, you don’t want to fuck with me.

I'LL SHOVE THAT CAN STRAIGHT UP YOUR AEROSOL!

Wake up! This is America, the home of free will and enterprise. Stop infringing on others rights and take advantage of few of your own. Start a business, you can charge assholes like me to see the shit you do!

SFist: Warm Water Cove Going To The Dogs by Jim

Photo Credit: SFist. An SFPD cruiser backs out from the cove after responding to a report of possible taggers in the area.