Saturday, November 10, 2007

San Francisco Mayor: Losing Ability to Walk?

Relax. Gavin Newsom has a clean bill of health, but City doctors say San Francisco's sidewalks are terminal.

There's too many obstilces to hazard walking in the City.

Case in point, the Flor de Lys, a French restaurant located nearby hustling Union Square, erected two huge cement planters in front of the building to bookend a red carpet that rolls enormous fanfare from the doorstep to curb perpendicular to the many who walk as to greet the few who don't.

While this would be welcome in Bellaire, Scottsdale or Palm Springs, it's obsticle here. These walkways are our lifelines delivering art students, downtown professionals, tourist, shoppers to galleries, theatres, etc.

Since when did merchants like the Flor de Lys own the sidewalk? This is not beautifiation, this is dirty business. This is obstruction. We need some mayoral angioplasty to step up and unclog our thoroughfares of this fatty French cuisine. I mean, if a minivan turned sideways on a commuter lane we’d call the National Guard, right?
Imagine a tree planted in driveway of your suburban home?

Please take a stroll to 777 Sutter Street between Taylor and Jones. Stop and gawk at the beautiful bottleneck. If you can't take the risk, we understand. Close your eyes and give me space as I back up and replay the scene... I SAID, I NEED ROOM PEOPLE... back it up! Ahhhhh, that's it - Merci Bucu!

"Traffic is completely severed."

Low and outside... Grandpa’s Cadillac door swings open on your left from the curbside choppng at your knees. Centered in front of the building with grand prestige are the two palm trees funneling skyward from the middle of the sidewalk like an angry 500 lb nose guard daring all on comers. Add a valet stand on your right and Grandma waltzing her walker like a hit and run es-car-got - viola! You’ve got yourself one Rude, French Clusterfuck!

"Care for a plate of Frogger dodging moving cars as you detour around the sidewalk and double-parked gas-guzzlers?"
I called Gavin’s 311, which I applaud; and hopefully the wheels are in motion, but I'm tired of playing hall monitor. There’s got to be a budget and personnel designated to proactively police our sidewalks.

Every time I turn on my television, I’ve some washed up actor like David Schwimmer lecturing me about Clean Air and Green Living; yet, how can I get to the Market & Powell MUNI/BART mall, without having to slalom through the outstretched arms of homeless zombies plus the litany of signs, podiums, plants and tables littered around bus stops, mailboxes, newspaper stands, etc.

If these greedy merchants can’t exercise some common sense and restraint, then someone on Gavin’s team should. I know a homeless solution is expensive, but a Sidewalk Czar shoud be relatively cheap, eh?


  • Why does spend dough to create an eyesore with a huge sign the reads, Intercity Home, on the side of a building on the 100 Block of 6th Street? I see it everyday returning to the City from the 101 – stupid!

  • Why does the abandoned building across the street with all the furniture bolted to the exterior walls have graffiti paintings of huge nipples?

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